Yes I'm using my son's toy turtle as a metaphorical symbol to slow down. Here's the message - to myself.
Life is short, but it will be shorter if I don’t slow down. I need to take the time to smell the roses (or the sweet smell of a freshly bathed baby boy) and just accept the way things are. right now.
Vent: Today, I need a little perspective and I have been truly struggling . . . why can’t people just do what I want and behave the way I want them to!? Obviously, this isn’t realistic but when I really think about it that’s what I’m asking of them. I become this spiteful person who wants to call people out and say a whole bunch of “I told you so’s”. I don’t want to be that way. That really isn’t who I am. It’s hard.
Over the past few years dealing with so many disastrous life altering problems of other people , I’ve become a little desensitized. I HATE feeling that way! So, when people come to me with issues – I go pretty flat. When it should really remind me of why I do my job and why I became a social worker to begin with.
Sometimes, I want to scream and just say “I’m I allowed to have a bad day once in a while?” I REALLY try to keep it positive, but some days…I’m just over it. My head goes to such a negative place. Then there are days like today when there is SO MUCH going on up there, I just completely shut down and struggle to make myself care. ARG!
Perspective: I (me, Stephanie, wife, daughter, sister, Jonah’s mommy) have an incredible life! Yes I’m allowed to have a bad day, but I’m also responsible for being thankful. I am responsible for asking forgiveness and grace. It’s my job to pray for compassion and empathy when I can’t seem to muster it up. I’m not quite there today, but I know there is a light for me. So, I am taking THIS moment to slooow down and just be.
I am grateful. For my life, my family, interrupted sleep, a mommy loving baby, and my job. Right now I’m thankful for this place – this blog – for providing me with so much more than I ever expected.
Thank You friends.
Linking up for this WORDFUL Wednesday.